Taking a Breather

Yasmeen talks about the struggle of maintaining self-confidence whilst pursuing your dreams, and how it's all about balance when it comes to surviving university.

            - Yasmeen 

‘If you were born with the weakness to fall, you were born with the strength to rise. Give yourself credit for how far you've come.'

I remember it like it was yesterday; all of the excitement and nerves that built up inside of me when I found out that I had been given a place at University to study Adult Nursing back in 2015. An overwhelming feeling. A mixture of every emotion. Then, a few months into my degree, I was diagnosed with clinical depression and generalized anxiety disorder. I had just started to embark on probably the biggest journey of my life and now I was full of many doubts. Could I make it through the whole 3 years whilst battling my own demons? Why was I feeling like this now? I had wanted to study Adult Nursing for as long as I could remember. Where had all my self-belief gone?

According to the Higher Education Statistics Agency, the number of students dropping out of university due to a mental health condition has trebled in the more recent years; between 2014 and 2015, a staggering 1,180 students left university early. I know this because I like to do my research to see how many people have actually acted on my daily thoughts. I was a lot more determined in my first year to prove myself wrong. Now I have just gone into my third year, and I feel like I’ve hit a wall. I feel like I’m struggling more than ever at the moment, with my anxiety taking over significantly. I struggle with social anxiety a lot where I find it hard being around too many people at a single one time- I have on many occasions been sat in a lecture theatre surrounded by all of the regular faces of the members of my cohort and felt like I needed to escape. My palms go sweaty and my heart starts racing and suddenly everything feels like a blur. I am trying to change my mindset towards my education, as I have felt on several occasions that I have wanted to quit and give up, to drop out and focus on myself and my health- but I am determined not to let my anxiety get in the way of achieving my dreams. A quote that I have always loved goes as follows: "The temptation to quit will be greatest just before you are about to succeed”- and I feel like that is my motivation to continue because I am so close!

Tips on dealing with mental health at University: 

  

  Ø  Use your universities support system! Take advantage of the available support that your university has to offer you. Whether that be a mental health wellbeing team or a counselling service. Having somebody to talk to at university can be useful.

  Ø  Do not be afraid to tell your lectures/tutors/mentors that you are struggling. These staff are trained at supporting students who have personal issues. They might be able to give you some additional academic support.

  Ø  Do not push yourself further than your limits. If you feel that your mental health is having a down period, do not feel guilty for taking a breather or a break from any work you may have to do. Giving yourself a break will allow yourself to work better in the long run.

I think the hardest part for me is finding a balance; a balance between looking after myself, my mental health, as well as putting my all into my degree and finding time for personal commitments. My mental health has taken over my life in more ways than imaginable. It has stripped me of my confidence and has affected my academic abilities. I feel as though I cannot function like I used to; I lack in concentration and motivation. It is such a huge battle, and nothing is more difficult than trying to better yourself whilst still trying hard to achieve your goals. I guess my main message is that it's ok to take time to breathe. Your degree is only a small number of years, but your mental health is life long. Your grades will never be more important than your health, and I hope anybody else experiencing what I am going through realizes this. Prioritise yourself and your success will follow!

 Hi, my name is Yasmeen and I am 21 years old. I was born and raised in East London and I am currently in my final year of studying Adult Nursing at London South Bank University. I have been suffering with Anxiety and Depression for around 2 years now and I see it as my goal to raise awareness about mental health, to change the stigma towards mental illness and to get people talking! Blogging my experience is a way for me to deal with my own problems and hopefully write about things that people can relate too.  

If you are considering taking time out of university due to mental health issues, speak to the student services and/or your academic tutors. 

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Hitting “rock-bottom” and how to get back up

Michael shares his story of experiencing mental health issues.

- Michael Rigby

I guess my mental health concern came throughout childhood. I was just another one of those kids who would be treated differently due to being overweight. My first problem came when I was in my last year of secondary school. The stress of my exams was just one factor that caused a lot of stress in my life at the time. My focus was also on losing as much weight as I could and I achieved that. However, I ended up making myself very ill. The real issue that really effected me during this time was that I completely messed up my exams. The exams that were supposed to open doors to the future. My stress and anxiety levels had created me to be very weak and I just couldn't concentrate.

Two years of college, enrolled onto a course that wasn't my first choice. I wasn't satisfied with the position that I had got myself in. However, I felt my choices were limited. I felt that I had failed myself and that I was still being punished. I use to sit there in the classroom thinking about the time I messed up my exams and what caused me to lead to that extreme. I would often interact with others on the same course and I did make friends. However, this wasn't what I worked hard for. I felt my potential was never shown to others. My mind was always in a different place and people wouldn't even recognise that I was suffering, “suffering in silence”. I completed the two-years with ease and achieved top grades. However, that was still not good enough for me.

The Two-Years Of Quitting- The worst two years of my life came within my time at college. My mind would always take over me in any situation. Whether it was learning to drive, socialising with friends or whilst at the gym. I just wasn't interested in anything I loved to do. I quit driving because I couldn't concentrate and I felt it was unsafe to keep learning. My friends would ask me to do something and I would make up an excuse. The gym, this is a place where I always enjoyed going, I quit my membership. These were just three things I quit during that time. I ended up staying in my bedroom staring at the ceiling whilst getting stressed about anything. I still didn't want to talk about it.

It's Time To Talk- My time to talk came in the last few months of college. My parents were worried about me so they had contacted my college tutor for help. I was given an appointment to see the college counsellor, I told her everything. I went from feeling I had a weight on my back too feeling calm for a while. I realised it was good to talk about things. She understood everything and put her time into helping me. In some ways counselling did help me. However, I also found that I was strong enough to get back up from, “hitting rock-bottom”. Sometimes, I would still get confused because I'm very good at helping others rather than myself. I'm sure I'm not the only one who feels that. My first step to getting back up, was signing up for the gym again. And I've been attending ever since. My advice on the way to get back up is to take a “step by step” regime. Gradually restart your passions that you always loved or start new interests. It's your choice and don't let anybody stop you.

I'm currently a University student in London. Over the past year I took some time out for a gap-year and a break from education. I feel it's the best decision I've ever made. It's vital that everyone, “takes a moment”. Give yourself time to rebuild and create a solid mind for the future. Take my advise, KEEP ON GOING! DON’T GIVE UP!

Hi, I'm Michael Rigby and I study Sports Business and Broadcasting at UCFB Wembley. I have experienced a mental illness such as; depression/social anxiety since the age of 14.

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We Need Mental Health Education in Schools

Kate draws upon her own experiences with mental health to advocate for better mental health education in all schools.

-Kate

All of us have mental health and all of us can at some point suffer from mental health difficulties, yet mental health remains steeped in great stigma. In fact, 26% of young people in the UK experience suicidal thoughts*; 1 in 10 suicides in the UK are by those aged 15-24**; and 10% of young people have a diagnosable mental health condition**. Why then is mental health not on the national curriculum for primary and secondary schools?

I vividly recall, throughout my primary and secondary education, lessons on safe sex, healthy eating, drug use and bullying, but not even one on mental health. Mental health is equally as important as – and can often be a cause or consequence of these issues. In fact, a 2014 survey by Beatbullying found that 55% of those bullied as children develop mental health conditions as adults, with more than one in three having suicidal thoughts or self-harming. So why is it neglected from the school curriculum?

At 11 years old, I experienced notable changes in my mental health. I started to experience insomnia, often struggling to get to sleep until 3am which at 11 years old was confusing and distressing. And, apart from going to school or to the odd sleepover/meet-up with friends, I barely left my room let alone my house. I found myself constantly making up excuses to avoid going out. I didn’t know why: I just couldn’t, nor did I want to, leave the house. 

My difficulties got worse when I was 12; I had just moved back to the UK and started at a new girls’ grammar school. I remember going to school each day and spending all day with my friends yet feeling so alone. As I struggled more with depression, anxiety, an eating disorder and suicidal thoughts, I had what felt like these huge and shameful secrets and that I had no one to go to. One part of me was desperate for someone to read my mind, to notice I wasn’t okay, whilst the other part of me put all energy into masking my struggles – I was terrified of anyone finding out and seeing into my private world. 

Throughout my school years I didn’t realise that I was suffering from serious mental health difficulties. I had never been taught about depression, eating disorders, anxiety, or suicidal ideation, so how on earth was I supposed to understand my own mental health? It is no wonder that I spent so many years living in fear and shame for conditions that could have been treated much earlier on. 

When people do open up about their mental health, they are often faced with invalidation and stigma. The stigmas attached to mental health often stem from ignorance. Without mental health education, it is inevitable that young people are going to be ill informed about mental health and thus will likely struggle to openly discuss, understand and support others with a mental illness. 

So, can we blame people’s ignorance when schools have failed to educate them about mental health? Until people start talking about, normalising and understanding mental health, ignorance and stigmas will continue to be reinforced. The stigmas attached to mental health need to be broken and compulsory mental health education in schools is an incredibly important step towards this. 

Being taught about mental health may not necessarily have prevented my mental health conditions but I may have been more aware about my mental health and may not have suffered for so many years in silence. Maybe I would have felt able to seek help without fearing being judged and would have recognised sooner that I wasn’t well. 

Ultimately, mental health education in schools could encourage a young person to speak out about their own mental health with the confidence that they will not be stigmatised, but that their feelings will be validated and that they will receive the support they deserve and need.

If you're feeling low or anxious as a student we might be able to help you get support. For more information about finding support services visit www.studentminds.org.uk/find-support.html.

* YoungMinds (2016a) Mental health statistics. http://www.youngminds.org.uk/about/whats_the_problem/mental_health_statistics (Accessed: 6 November 2016).

** YoungMinds (2016b) Mental health statistics - young people statistics. Available at: http://www.youngminds.org.uk/training_services/policy/mental_health_statistics

Hi I'm Kate, a Psychology undergraduate at King's College London. I want to write for Student Minds to share my ongoing experiences with mental illness, hopefully helping others to feel less alone, more able to speak up, and to break the stigma surrounding mental illness. 

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